HOW TO MANAGE YOUR EMOTIONS

HOW TO MANAGE YOUR EMOTIONS

Emotion is a common state especially to humans, every human irrespective of our profession or calling posses this special gift. Ou... 04:34

Emotion is a common state especially to humans, every human irrespective of our profession or calling posses this special gift.

Our internal state of being and involuntary physiological response to a situation or object is based on our physical state and sensory system.

Every human is subject to all the same emotional feelings and reactions experienced by other humans. The ability to get angry, impatience, sexual attraction, sad are all involuntary to every humans, although these emotions could be controlled (that’s what makes us humans) we can’t really determine when or where it happens since they are involuntary.

Emotions will always be there, they never go away, never doubt their existence since you can’t get rid of them. You can only manage them.

Managing our emotions simple means our ability to show emotion when they are positive and helpful and our ability to control them when they are negative and destructive.

Managing our emotion properly is very important as not properly managing them could destroy us.

“There are moments when this urge for sexual intercourse comes and I become so desperate, I could go to bed with just any girl to satisfy my sex appetite. Usually after the intercourse I despise myself for going to bed with the girl, a stranger, sometimes a prostitute. People I had no sexual attractions for. Most of all I knew what I was doing was wrong, often wondered what would happen if one of this girls get pregnant, of course I am not ready to be a father and abortion is evil- but I could not stop myself no matter how hard I tried ” – (Anonymous)

Sexual urge is normal, it is not demonic to have that urge for intercourse, but using this as an excuse to sleep with just any available person makes us animals, if you ask the monkeys, dogs why they sleep with just any available female counterpart, am sure they will give you the same reason you will give for going to bed with that stranger.

Our emotions could be managed, no matter how bad, or chronic it is right now, you can subject them and control them. The reputation built for years can be tarnished in a minute primarily because of our inability to control our emotions.

“I used to be a secretary in a construction company. My manager was very friendly, his wife could come around sometimes in the office and we gossiped a lot. I was just 22 years old and I could guess the wife was in her late 50’s meaning by boss was not less than 60 years Old. I respected him a lot. I had never addressed him by his name until the day he confessed he loved me. Said I wouldn’t lack anything if I agreed to start a relationship with him. I couldn’t believe it, I was so disappointed. Though he came to apologise when he realised how disappointed I was, things never remained the same. Eventually I had to resign” –Mary.

Victims of dented relationship due to unmanaged emotions never imagined or planned for it. If you think it can’t happen to you, well, I have seen Men of God (Pastors), celebrities, elders. I have seen them fall because of uncontrolled emotions, so think twice while making those assumptions.

WHY YOUR EMOTIONS MUST BE CONTROLLED

·         1.They lead to negative addiction: when those urge keep coming and we keep trying to satisfy them, one could end up masturbating to get relieved. Continuous practice becomes an addiction.

·       2.  Uncontrolled emotions tarnish long standing reputation.

·        3. They cause less self value/ low self esteem

·        4. Public embarrassment/ harassment.

·        5. Disappointment and loss of trust from loved ones.

The bottom line is this: Uncontrolled emotions have devastating effects, sometimes it takes special rehabilitation centres and spiritual help to get deliverance.

HOW TO MANAGE THEM

Managing your emotions is the ability to show emotion when they are positive and helpful and the ability to curtail emotions when they are negative and destructive.

1.       Admit they exist:- You cannot control what does not exist. Once you become conscious of the fact that they exist, you have taken the first step to controlling them. 

2.       Avoid Stimulants:- You understand yourself better. You know the things that arouse you sexually, things that get you easily upset, try to avoid seeing nude scenes and pornographic sites/ movies.

3.       Avoid lonely places:- You know what happens to idle minds. Try to be with friends that will help you out.

4.       Seek for help:- Read articles that will help you. Special counsel centres in churches and other organisations can help. Visit and discuss with them. It doesn’t cost anything compared to the damage if not treated.

5.       Believe in yourself:- You are not an animal. You are responsible, the best. Believe positive things about you and reject every negative thing like being a dog, fornicator, etc.

Alternatively, I have a proven and very simple way you can get your emotion under your control. There is no Sin God cannot forgive. You can truly give your life to him and believe me; you will never go back to that negative life again because God now dwells in you. God bless you.

FINDING LASTING HAPPINESS

FINDING LASTING HAPPINESS

Sometimes in life we will have abundance and at other times we may be in real need. Yet through Christ we can be strengthened, be at pea... 04:59

Sometimes in life we will have abundance and at other times we may be in real need. Yet through Christ we can be strengthened, be at peace and be genuinely happy, experiencing the joy of the Lord.


The advice most people give is to ‘look after number one’, because if you don’t put yourself first, no one else will. Jesus, again, contradicts this. ‘He who finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his life for My sake will find it.’ Matt 10:39.

‘Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul? For the Son of Man will come in the glory of His Father with His angels, and then He will reward each according to his works”.’ Matt 16:24-27.

Nature also teaches us this. For a tree to bear fruit, its seed first goes into the ground and dies. The fruit it bears is not for itself, but is a gift to all who will partake of that fruit. New life and abundant fruit is the result of the seed going into the ground to die.

Jesus taught us that if we tried to put ourselves first and looked after ‘number one’, then there would be no fruit of happiness. But if we would deny ourselves for Christ, we would find abundant life in Christ. Jesus said, ‘I have come that you might have life and have it in abundance’. This abundant life that Jesus spoke of is a life of joy in Christ.

‘Be of good cheer’, is a statement that Jesus made on several occasions. One of the occasions was to do with finding joy in a world of conflict and sorrow. He taught that He had overcome those pressures of the world that rob and destroy, and found peace and joy. He taught that it was possible for His followers to also overcome through prayer and the enabling presence and life of the Holy Spirit.

‘Therefore you now have sorrow; but I will see you again and your heart will rejoice, and your joy no one will take from you.’ John 16:22.

‘These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.’ John 16:33.

On another occasion, Jesus said, ‘Be of good cheer, your sins are forgiven you’. Forgiveness of sins would be the most important reality for true joy and happiness. Sin robs us of peace. Sin brings guilt and shame. Sin leaves our soul in darkness. Sin stands in the way of open relating. Sin separates us from God. We have no power or capacity to forgive and remove our own sin. No man can forgive sin. Jesus, only, can forgive our sin. He came to earth that He might take away the sin of the world. Christ died for our sins. Happy is the person whose sins are forgiven and for whom God has removed all record of sinful deeds.

Jesus invites you to come confessing your sin to Him and accepting that it was your sin that He bore on the cross. Turn to Him, call on Him to be your Lord and receive His life. Jesus taught very clearly that for His life to be in us we must participate and abide in the fellowship of the body of Christ which is His church. He said, ‘If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full.’ John 15:10-11

It is His joy that enables us to have our joy full. His disciple John said that this is experienced through the fellowship of the body of Christ which is the church.

WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW BEFORE CHEATING ON YOUR SPOUSE

WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW BEFORE CHEATING ON YOUR SPOUSE

Cheating on a spouse is the ultimate form of betrayal. It destroys trust, which is the very core of any loving relationship. Unfortuna... 01:25

Cheating on a spouse is the ultimate form of betrayal. It destroys trust, which is the very core of any loving relationship.

Unfortunately, in our marriage research, we have rarely observed couples who have successfully rebuilt their relationship after infidelity.

By nature, those who engage in infidelity are dishonest, disloyal, and lack moral strength within the relationship, so rebuilding the trust is a nearly impossible task. Why? Because being unfaithful fractures a wholesome, successful, and enduring relationship at its very foundation.

There are NO excuses for infidelity! And there is no excuse for accepting it from your partner. It is an absolute deal breaker—the first time, the second time, or anytime.

Cheating on the one you love is the most unpardonable of all sins. When a spouse or lover violates the "core of trust" or the "bond of faith" in the relationship, the very heart of that relationship has likely been destroyed.

Loving someone for a lifetime does not occur by accident. To keep love alive and thriving, both partners must do simple things, day in and day out, that nurture their relationship.

In other words, you cannot betray the one you love and expect your marriage or relationship to survive happily.

It pains our heart to see couples embrace the values of the "Desperate Housewives," thinking it's okay to cheat on a loved one and everything will be okay afterward.

The ultimate betrayal of the one you say you love is an unrecoverable act!

 There is rarely EVER an authentic recovery from a relationship poisoned by cheating, betrayal, infidelity, and disloyalty. Those who have been successfully married for years know this is true.

Don't be misled by those who suggest otherwise.

Being honest and trustworthy is at the heart of all the best loving relationships we have studied. Those couples trust each other with their lives, their fortunes and their sacred honor. The damage done by breaking that trust it just too great. The relationship will never be the same.

UNVEILING THE ATTRACTION IN YOU

UNVEILING THE ATTRACTION IN YOU

We strongly recommend you read our post on why you should not be obsessed with your body . This will help you appreciate this interest... 03:59

We strongly recommend you read our post on why you should not be obsessed with your body. This will help you appreciate this interesting topic more. You may also like why you should not set expectations in a relationship.

Attraction has diverse meaning to different people. It is indeed one of the fundamental characteristics of man, even animals. It varies from sexual, family attraction, attraction for inanimate objects etc. This article will focus mostly on self relevance – the special attention a person gets from others.

The feeling of relevance, importance, and independence are fundamental. Everybody wants to be special, different, you name them. It is only natural to feel this way.
“Growing up as a child was fun, lots of friends around, everybody seemed to like me, and nearly everyone in the neighborhood knew me by name. It felt like there was something special about me that even I could not understand”- Jimmy.

According to Jimmy, things are pretty much different now that he is grown. People hardly noticed him, that special feeling is gone, he doesn’t feel there’s much difference between himself and every other person. He has become a regular kind of guy before everybody. What really happened?

People naturally tend to judge others based on their confidence, elegance, appearance, behaviour. Once you possess most of these attributes, you become attractive, everybody tend to believe there is something special about you. It is that “special” thing that draws people’s attention to you. They want to hear you speak because they believe from your appearance or behaviour (composure) you should have something reasonable to offer. Here’s the problem. When they come closer to you and eventually discover that actually you are just like every other person, you make mistakes, make wrong decisions, you’re emotionally unstable- that special feel of wanting to know more about you, come closer to you gradually fades and before you know it, you are just like every other person.

Staying attractive before foxes
“It is better to shut your mouth and be thought a fool than to open it wide and clear all doubts”

Your relevance to the society depends largely on how attractive you are. Think about it, why do companies spend millions to design their brands, re-brand and carefully package their product? Your guess is as good as mine. They want it to look attractive so end-users (consumers) will prefer it to other similar products.

Here’s the big question: What do you think would make a firm choose you over a hundred other applicants? Why would a guy choose you over a thousand other girls? Why should God pay special attention to your situation when billions of people probably have similar or worse problems- How attractive are you?

Stay updated:- (Daniel in the Bible) Daniel always seemed to have solutions to every problem (an excellent spirit was upon him). If a musician sings a song and after sometime, does not sing another, people will tend to forget such a person. What is that thing you are good at? The thing that people admire you for? Do you think you need more training to stay updated?

Be different:- Why do you think the King chose Esther to many other girls in the popular bible story? Would you say she was more beautiful? God intervened? Or that she did something different? Of course the later was the case. Foolishness is doing what every other person is doing and expecting a different result. What is it you are doing because every other person is?

Appreciate Yourself:- People will not see you different from the way you see yourself, you are actually how you see yourself. Appreciate yourself, say positive things to you, believe you are the best in whatever you do, that way others will appreciate you more.

You must know that attractive people are people with solutions rather than problems. 

Truth: No one is ever relevant outside God. The Holy Spirit is the author of attraction. Get connected now and stay relevant.